I have always been very transparent on my blog. My family knows that there is a good chance that anything we do or say may end up on my blog or in some form of social media. Our marriage is no different. Granted, I don’t share with you every nasty detail of our marriage. I do share with you some of our struggles to let you know that we are NOT perfect and we never will be. I had a newsletter from my absolute favorite resource,the Happy Wives Club , that posed the question… Is your marriage better today than it was yesterday?
That got me thinking about the fact that my marriage is definitely better today than it was yesterday. Hang it’s better than it was five years ago when we first got married. We have literally be living the vows that we stated when we got married back on May 21, 2008.
What Living the Vows Means
Living the vows means that we have to it stick out when the going gets rough. We have to put our spouses ahead of everyone else in our lives. We have to WORK daily to find a way to get through life’s battle grounds. We have to be there for our spouses through sickness, complex job situations, and losing family members.
Living the Vows in Motion
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I’ve found that one of the biggest things that makes the most difference in marriage is open honest hard core communication with each other. Couples who are not connected enough with each other that they can’t finish each other’s thoughts, know what the other wants prior to them asking for it, and is not having their physical needs met by their spouse are NOT, and I repeat NOT, having the type of communication it takes to survive the hard times in a relationship.
That leads to many issues in marriage. To me lack of communication, is a silent marriage killer that is more deadly than a spouse who cheated on their spouse. Nine times out of ten a spouse who cheated on their spouse is a result of them not having a connection with their spouse anymore.
Due to my husband and I having open communication, we were able to set up a plan to help him achieve his goals with fixing the store he’s operating and still be a part of our lives here. It’s not going to be much easier and he’s not going to be home that much more for a while. However, every little bit makes a difference. Instead of him making a uniform decision about the extra hours he’s putting in, we’re making them together now. Now he works late when I have blogging events going on. Now we’re not missing out on the chance to be together.
Let’s face it in our society that we live in, we are all slammed packed with obligations. We all have to work extremely hard in order to literally make ends meet. I don’t think I even need to mention all the events that go on for our kids lives.
As a couple though, we have to work together to get schedules straight and still have time for US. Last night we literally were able to be together from 8:30pm until 1Am spending quality time together. It was pure heaven! It helped us remember why we got married. It helped us reconnect with each other completely.
I feel like I can handle going through the hard season of his work load for a while longer now. I believe that I won’t continue to go on this emotional roller coaster ride I was on because now I know I’m a part of helping him decide when to work the extra hours. Now granted, there are going to still be days when he has no control over having to do it, but at least I can feel like we’re being a team.
I realize not all couples have that option. However,you do have the option to discuss in detail how events in your life are affecting your relationship. Keep in mind, when something affects you individually it has an impact on both of you.
Prime Example of Living the Vows
A friend of mine has a marriage that is one worth mentioning. Their marriage was always one that fascinated me. You see them in church and how they showered each other with affection. They have eyes that sparkled for each other even after years of marriage.
Then she got diagnosed with breast cancer. To be honest, I was scared to death what was going to happen to her relationship with her husband. I feared for her little girl’s world. Through the course of her treatments and her recovery, I still observed her relationship with her husband.
Guess what happened?? He loved her through it….
If that isn’t living the vows of marriage, then I don’t know what is!! True marriage vows are ones that we make to last a lifetime.
How are living the vows of marriage today to make your marriage better than it was yesterday?