Today I went to go see a couple whom I consider my adoptive grandparents since I was nine years old. They have loved me from a distance and only offered me advice when I’ve asked for it. They have always let me know they were there for me when I needed them. When I did need them, they were there with bells on and were truly an enormous lifesaver for me during a hard time of my life. However, it’s their Godly love for each other and for others that have always been the thing that I’ve admired and respected for them most.
Their Bibles are well used. They have notes from every sermon and Bible study they have attended. I can remember being a young girl looking over her shoulder reading in awe as she took her notes. I watched her, and her husband pick on one another with total love and devotion. I have watched them go through the good and the hard times of life never wavering in their desire to be together. They have been married to over fifty years, and to them it feels like they only just got married.
I yearned to have a marriage like theirs. Due to their marriage being a reflection of God’s love honestly is the reason I started reading the [easyazon_link identifier=”0310916100″ locale=”US” tag=”tidbitofexp-20”] Couples Devotional Bible New International Version[/easyazon_link] when I was in my teens. I was determined to have a marriage that would last a lifetime. If I had followed my heart the first time, I would have had that. God made sure that I am with my true love in the end though.
Today they said something to me that really struck me to the core. They told me that they could tell that Del was a good man and a keeper. Mind you, in all the years that I’ve known them and Del both, they have barely seen each other but a handful of times. I looked at them and said how can you say that? They said, “the way you carry yourself and act now say he’s a good man.”
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I looked at them puzzled at how my demeanor and actions could tell them that I am married to a good guy. They stated that I am happier now. I am also considerate of how he feels at all times. I have never said a bad thing about him to them. They can tell I’m free to be me. It was nice to hear them give their blessing upon my marriage like they did.
It made me ponder whether or not other women could gain the same reaction from those around them. After all, the saying is that our marriage is the first reflection of God’s love. I know many women who get together and downgrade their spouses.
I have been guilty of it until a dear friend of mine put a screeching halt to it. I love her to death for teaching me that valuable lesson. Now when I was around other’s I don’t say anything negative about Del. The reality is that they can’t fix what annoys me about Del. Only through prayer and profound heart to heart discussions with Del can that happen. Many times, just like in my parenting role, there are times when I have to change my outlook first before any real change can take place.
I think we all need to take the time to realize that our marriages are a reflection of God’s love for us. Many times others look at how we act towards our spouse as a way of knowing what love looks like. I know my kids always notice how Del and I act with each other. I’ve had other friends comment on it. I’ve failed to take into account how others are viewing it too.
I am NOT sitting here saying that I’m the perfect wife or mother. I am striving to become that person daily. I have MANY shortcomings that I’m working to fix with each passing day. I do believe though that with God’s love and power that can happen.
Are you striving to have your marriage be an accurate reflection of God’s love?