Have you been married long enough to notice an issue that many people don’t notice yet? As a man who has been married to his wife for over six years and has known her for over half my life, I can say this and get away with it. The other day I was writing my blog post about being 41 and over weight, and it reminded me of all the little snide remarks my wife gets away with saying that I would never dream of saying to her for fear of being chopped up into mincemeat.
Why is it that women can tell guys that we have a spare tire or a beer gut or we’re just getting fat? Yet, a guy cannot in anyway shape or form tell his wife, girlfriend, or any female friend in general that they “MIGHT” be “out of shape in anyway?”
To me, this part of a larger pattern that women and men have prolonged long enough. Women are entitled to equal rights as men. Therefore, in my humble male opinion, I think women should “fem up” and take the criticism that they so rightly dish out to guys. After all, we have feelings just as much as they do. We just don’t ‘show ours’ as much as they do.
It hurts me when I hear from my wife that I’ve put on weight or that my hair is turning gray. Yea, I know it’s a part of life just like when it happens to HER. However, I don’t say anything to her about it not only because I don’t want my head chewed off, but also because I don’t want to hurt her feelings. I have found out that many other men are in the same boat as me.
Women ask how something looks on them and I’m supposed to give them a polite and delicate answer instead of being bluntly honest like she sure is with me. There have been two outfits in all the years I’ve known my wife that I absolutely could not stand on her that I HAD to say something about it. However, overall I don’t voice my opinion one way or the other unless it’s an outfit that she puts on that just drives me nuts with passion then I forbid her to wear it out of the house. After all, I don’t want another man getting any ideas!
I know my wife doesn’t mean any harm by being truthful with me. I do feel though that there shouldn’t be any backlash when I do the same with her. Sometimes the truth hurts! Plain and simple. Growing old is not something that can be avoided, and as you age, it sure is hard to lose the weight that seems to come on overnight. If you’re going to give criticism doing it with gentle words regardless whether you’re talking to a man or a woman.
What are your thoughts on this issue? Is it happening in your home too?