Key Takeaways
Husband is constantly unhappy and complaining about every job he’s had, despite achieving his goals.
His negative attitude is damaging our relationship and causing huge fights.
I’m worried he’ll never be satisfied in any career long-term, which could prevent us from building a future.
John and I have been together for 3 years. When we first started dating, he was working as a bartender and seemed pretty happy with his job. He worked 4 nights a week, made decent money, and had a flexible schedule.
About a year into our relationship, John decided he wanted to make a career change. He felt like bartending wasn’t going to lead anywhere, and he wanted something more stable. I supported his decision to go back to school for computer programming.
For the next 2 years, John worked part-time bartending while attending classes. It was tough at times, but he was motivated and excited about starting a new career.
John graduated 6 months ago and quickly found a job as a junior developer at a tech company. I was so proud of him for sticking it out and achieving his goal.
But almost immediately after starting the new job, his attitude changed. He began complaining nonstop about his boss, his coworkers, and the work environment. He nitpicked every little thing about the job.
At first, I tried to be sympathetic and suggest ways he could improve the situation. I told him every job has its downsides and encouraged him to focus on the positives. But no matter what I said, it didn’t help.
The constant complaining has put a real strain on our relationship. We’ve gotten into huge fights over this issue. I’ve told John that his negative attitude is affecting my happiness and our life together.
I’m at a loss for how to get through to him. He’s now talking about quitting his job after only 6 months. But I know that won’t solve anything if he’s just going to be miserable at the next job too.
I want to support John, but I’m starting to worry that he’ll never be satisfied in any career. No matter what job he has, he always seems to find a way to hate it. I don’t know how we can build a future together if he refuses to stick with anything.
Has anyone else dealt with a partner who hates every single job? How do you get through to someone who is never happy with their work situation? I’m worried if this continues, it will eventually end our relationship.
