This Mommy Is Breaking the Sex Taboo and Talking to Her Teens

Key Takeaways

Talk openly about sex – Avoiding the topic leaves kids uninformed and vulnerable. Have ongoing, judgment-free conversations.

Give age-appropriate information – Use correct terms. Discuss consent and body autonomy early. Increase details as kids mature.

End the taboo – Don’t pass on silence and shame. Set kids up for healthy sexuality and smart choices.

Sex. Even the word makes some parents uncomfortable. But avoiding the topic altogether can leave kids confused, misinformed, and unprepared.

I grew up in a religious household where sex was taboo. My parents never talked to me about it beyond “Don’t do it.” I don’t blame them – they were a product of their own upbringing and time. But their silence left me ill-equipped for the feelings and experiences to come.

In middle school, I stumbled on my dad’s porn stash. This was my sex education – and let’s just say porn doesn’t model intimacy or consent.

By high school, my ignorance caught up with me. When my boyfriend pressured me to go further than I wanted, I didn’t know how to say no or that I could. I wish my parents had normalized those conversations. The lack of open communication made me vulnerable.

daughter hugging mother
Always remember to hug your kids.

Now as a parent, I’m breaking the cycle of silence. I remember how alone I felt back then. I want my kids to understand the joy of sexuality while protecting themselves.

We start early with lessons on body autonomy – their right to govern their own bodies. I explain that no one should touch them without permission. This lays the foundation for later talks on consent.

Around puberty, we have frank discussions about their changing bodies – erections, wet dreams, periods, etc. We use correct terms, not cutesy nicknames. My goal is to normalize the awkwardness, not amplify it.

Recently, we had the “sex talk” with our pre-teen daughter. We spoke candidly about waiting until she’s ready, using protection, and how real sex is different than porn. She asked thoughtful questions. She seemed relieved to finally discuss this mysterious, taboo topic.

Some argue kids should remain innocent. But ignorance breeds shame, misinformation, and harm. Information and openness breed confidence, understanding, and healthy sexuality.

By having ongoing, judgment-free conversations, we empower our kids to make safe, smart choices. It’s not easy, but it’s necessary. The awkwardness is temporary; the impact is lifelong.

Let’s raise sexually enlightened, not ignorant, generations. Our kids deserve that. The taboo must end with us.

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Crystal

I'm Crystal. I'm married to Dale, and mother to Johnny. Some might say that my life is perfect because I get to do all the cliché wife things like cooking, cleaning, and decorating - but there's more! I also have many hobbies including needlework (crochet), sewing, and reading. My son's education is important, so we homeschool him together.

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