How The Past Creates One of the Worst Marriage Mistakes

No matter if we are in a relationship or married, we have all have our past. Most of us realize that one of the worst marriage mistakes we can make while being in a marriage is to let your past influence our present. Have in mind that sometimes the most successful marriages are stable not because of the things both partners don’t do but because of the things they do.

The easiest answer of the question how to get rid of the past once and for all is to start thinking of our present and planning our future. However, that’s not always such an easy task because it is the past that influences on our present and determines our future. Our memories and our experience from the past can be blamed for everything we are.

[tbpquotable]People say, forget and forgive. Try to be understanding and tolerant towards your partner who is jealous of you. You will not only feel better but you will get rid of all the anger, sorrow and all negative thoughts.[/tbpquotable]

However, if you don’t really think that your spouse is the perfect one for you, then your marriage is doomed. Perfectionism has been proved to be one of the main problems in marriage because, after all, nobody is perfect. Be more patient and loving and don’t forget that your whole idea of “perfection” may not be the same as your spouse’s one.

We all have a life in which things change so rapidly that sometimes we don’t even realize what happens to us. There are so many things to do that past, present and future usually blur and sometimes that could be a problem.

It turns out that one of the most serious marital problems nowadays is connected to our social networks accounts. In the past, traces of infidelity were mostly associated with some lipstick on the shirt, some suspicious perfume traces or accidentally found love notes. Today, there are new ways to find out if your spouse is cheating on us, or not.

But how can our past affect our marriage? Imagine the following situation. Your husband is jealous without any reason and decides to check your personal social network profiles. And one day he runs across an image of you and another man that you have once uploaded in your account in a random social network. Rage, jealousy and disappointment suddenly take over him, he starts to ask questions, he continues sniffing behind your back and checks on you in the Internet and then the quarrel usually begins.

According to a research of the American Academy of family law more than 80% of the divorce lawyers use some activity on the Internet as an evidence of infidelity. And the reason for the divorce is often named as a flirt in the social networks.

It is true that users often forget that the information they publish on the social networks is visible to other people. Your communication with an ex can become public and we guarantee that your spouse will not like that.

When sharing their personal lives, people become more and more vulnerable. Social networks such as Facebook and Tweeter are not only easy to use but they often lead to cheating. This is how our past affects your whole new life, your partner’s behaviour and the relationship between you two. So, if you are planning to look for some old photos uploaded on the web or want to see what your ex is doing on Facebook, be careful and make a decision if you are ready to pay the price.

 

 

 

 

Author Bio: Jessica Conars is freelance blogger and writer. She has part-time job at cleaning agency in Brent Cross. She loves to read and write about people’s relationships.

 

Image courtesy of: http://www.flickr.com/photos/[email protected]/8400004028

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Crystal

I'm Crystal. I'm married to Dale, and mother to Johnny. Some might say that my life is perfect because I get to do all the cliché wife things like cooking, cleaning, and decorating - but there's more! I also have many hobbies including needlework (crochet), sewing, and reading. My son's education is important, so we homeschool him together.

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