I have been seeing so many people gripe about mothers working everywhere. Ironically, “I Don’t Know How She Does It”, has just come out on dvd today as well. I think this movie may have jump started a lot of the debate about working mothers vs. stay at home mothers. Of course, I have to admit this has been a big debate for many centuries as well.
I just am sick of seeing “working mothers” being cut down for wanting to have a career and kids. I have three beautiful kids, and I cherish every minute I have with them as well. I have to admit, I personally don’t want to return back to work any time soon, if I was given the choice 100%. However, the reality is, I may have to return to work due to not being able to financially afford to provide everything my kids NEEDS. However, I also do enjoy working!!! I love the thrill of reaching quotas and interacting with the public. I also enjoy the chance to focus on my doing something that I enjoy that doesn’t include my kids and family.
Do I think my kids will be less successful if I were working? It’s possible yes, but it’s equally as possible that they won’t be. I do homeschool my kids, and they do get pushed to the max by me because I know they are more than smart enough to do whatever I’m asking of them. Plus I do have a mother-in-law who also helps ensure that they do a lot of educational activities as well.
Do my kids miss me when I’m not at home? Yes, they do.
Do they think I love them less if I’m working? NO, if anything they appreciate me more because I am working and still doing for them at home.
Do I hate the fact that someone else gets to spend more times with my kids than I do, and do more for them than I do?? HELL YES!!! However, we live in society where people are forced to have to make more money in order to take care of a families needs. Everyone has been competing so much against each other, that in my book we’ve cut our noses off despite our faces.
Working Mothers Teach Their Kids Other Valuable Lessons
To me, working mothers are teaching their kids responsibility. They are teaching them how to adapt and also how to do what has to be done to take care of their families. They also show them proper work ethics to have (provided the parent actually has them.) They also teach their kids that nothing comes free in life, but in order to get somewhere they do have to work. Plus they see that a woman truly CAN have it all.
My mom was a single mother for a part of our lives. She worked second shift. Yes, I was on my own a good bit, but she left me with a list of chores. She also had me take care of our animals we had. My mom also taught me that if I wanted anything, I had to work to earn the money for it. I was working by the time I was 15 years old. I was a manager in a fast food place by the time I was 18 years old. I graduated from high school with honors. I strived to succeed. I worked as many hours as I could get.
I did strive to be one of the top employees in some form or fashion in all of my prior jobs. I know I’d do the same thing if I returned to work. I was also able to handle being a single mother. I thank my mother for all of this!! My mother was a “working mother!!”
My Defense as a Stay At Home Mom
Now the argument for my staying home. I LOVE being able to be with my kids all the time. I do think my kids treasure having me here because my boys have both made it clear that they don’t want me to return back to work. We do have to do without being able to do a lot of things we would like to do as a family. However, my kids see their parents happy, and have us both there with them (hubby works from home.) They also see us working on obtaining our college degrees from home as well. I get to see all their little moments. I get to install in them the traits that I value. I get to be a part of every moment in their lives. I don’t have to miss their “first moments.” I get to kiss them good night, and I get to have them wake me up in their own special ways in the mornings. Is it worth it to me to do without some things to be an active part of my kids lives?? Yes, BUT I do MISS working and the thrills it brings me. I am STILL praying for a way to have the best of both worlds!
Working mothers are not terrible mothers! They just have to juggle things in a different manner. There are pros and cons to both arguments!
I also feel that with the changes in technology…people should be allowed to work from home a LOT more! I know in my prior job, I did bring some of my work home with me!
What are your thoughts on BOTH sides of the coin?
Working at a regular job vs staying at home is such a tough decision. I opted to work part-time from home, which can be a win-win situation at times, but it also creates other challenges too. It also means we have to be more frugal than if I worked full-time. It’s hard when my kids come home wanting what their friends can afford because both of their parents work. You are right though that no matter what you choose in regards to working, others will find fault in it. You just have to feel confident that you know what is best for your family.
I totally understand your position and agree with you totally. It is hard to juggle it all when you work from home. To me working outside the home seems to be easier at times. Then other times, I’m glad that I can work from home and still see and hear them interacting.