Well, I have been losing this extra weight ever since Zeva was conceived. Well, so far even after she’s been born, it’s still coming off. My mom use to always say, “when she’s happy that weight will come off of her so quick everyone’s heads are going to spin.” I didn’t believe her, but I’m starting to truly believe what she said. I suffer with depression quite a bit, and when I’m wanting something major and can’t get it, it truly upsets me greatly and makes it hard for me to fight my depression.
Well, for seven years I wanted my husband back in my life, and well, I’ve been blessed with having him back in my life now for the past five years. However, we have had two kids during those five years. 🙂 I knew for the past four years that we wanted to try for another little girl, and I was literally giving it until my 32nd birthday for it to happen. God must have decided that he was ready to grant me my wish, and we found out before my birthday that Zeva was on the way. I have been vowing that once I was done being a baby maker and by my fifth wedding anniversary (2013) that I would lose this excess weight if it was the last thing I did.
While I was pregnant I was told I have gestational diabeties. Well, that meant I had to drastically change how I ate and literally drink water like it was going out of style. If I wanted to cheat and eat something high in sugar, that meant I had to drink at least three bottles of water in a two hour time frame to get a good reading on my blood sugar check. Hence, that meant that I was flushing out my system more. Well, I have kept to those rules even now after Zeva has been born. Guess what….
It’s working!!! I am now officially in a size 18 EASILY..no, laying on the bed to button them or jumping into them to make them go up….I can put them on just like I do a size 22. They look pretty darn good on me too (according to hubby), but I can do squats with them on as well and they aren’t pinching me. I was in near tears with excitement. I can only imagine how I’m going to feel when I officially can wear a size 10.
Hubby made me throw all of my clothes above a 1X or 18 into a bag to give away. I just went through all of my clothes and literally have my size 18 clothes from storage being washed. It’s an amazing feeling, but also a bit overwhelming.
While I was throwing those big clothes in the bag, I was a bit shocked how I felt. I was saying goodbye to some outfits that I truly liked and felt confident in. I was also saying goodbye to some good memories in some of those outfits. However, I was saying hello to looking and feeling sexier again. I was also realizing I’m that much closer to my goal.
I want to be healthy for my kids. I want my daughter to be able to wear my clothes like I did with my mom growing up. I want my daughter to be proud to call me her mom, and not worry about what her potential boyfriends may think when they look at me. (Yes, guys still look at a daughter’s mother to see how they are going to turn out in future years.) I want to be comfortable walking into a room again. (I DON’T want all the attention I use to get, but I do want to be recgonized for my skills and talents and not brushed off because I weigh so much.) There is so much being overweight has taught me, but there is equally as much that I miss about being a healthy desirable weight.
I’m doing this most of all for ME!! I’m loving how I’m feeling and how I’m starting to look (even though right now my body is going through the funny stages of not knowing how it wants to completely look.) It is all worth it!!!